Last To Know
by serialexperimentsjade
Summary: Howard leaves Vince. Vince gets depressed. Crappy sumary, I know. Rated M for self-harm and suicide in last chapter TWOSHOT
1. Littlest Things

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Jade: hey! this is my first mighty boosh fanfic! it's kinda depressing because i was depressed when i wrote this and was also listening to several sad songs at the same time. this is part 1 of 2 of the story.

**Warnings: character death, self-harm, slash refrences**

**Disclaimer: do i look like i own the mighty boosh? if i did, i'd make howard and vince do it every day on the hour!**

**Jade: enjoy!**

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**Last To Know**

**Part 1: Littlest things**

"why are you leaving?"

"because, vince, I am sick of looking at you. I'm sick and ashamed of you!"

Howard slammed the door shut behind him as he left, leaving vince in shock and tearful.

He remained fixed at the space where howard had been.

It hurt when he wasn't there. Vince placed a hand on his chest. He could feel it pounding through him. he was in agony.

Vince remained fixed to the sofa, staring into space, not caring the tears rolling down his facve was ruining his make up.

When naboo and bollo returned, vince was still sitting and staring into space.

"vince?"

Vince didn't reply, so bollo waved a hand in front of his face. Blue eyes didn't even flicker.

"bollo? What's up with vince?"

Naboo tried slapping vince but he didn't move.

"oh, no. he's gone emo."

Then naboo slapped vince with all of his shaman strength. Vince shook his head.

"where's howard?"

"gone. Said he was ashamed of me."

The shaman exchanged a look with bollo. Vince was in an emo state. They had lost him.

Vince got up and went to the bedroom he and howard used to share.

"I'm tired. 'night."

Once inside, vince locked the door and pulled down the blinds so no light shone through.

Switvhing on the bedside lamp, vince opened the drawer and drew out a kitchen knife.

_I really don't want to start this again but howard hurt me. Again._

Vince held the knife at his wrist and drew it across. Blood spilled down his pale wrist and onto the snpw white sheets.

He stabbed himself in his arm over and over again.

Red welts weeped down pale white skin and dripped onto the sheets.

Vince cried harder as he put the knife back into the drawer and turned off the light.

Climbing under the blood-splattered sheets, vince huddled into a ball and cried himself to sleep.

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**Jade: how was the story? _i _was depressed because i had recently got pregnant only to miscarry two weeks later. then i watched the episode 'party' for the thousanth time and wrote this. i only bothered to put this up today. **

**R&R! flames will be put in howard's wardrobe! **


	2. Sorry

**A/N: I'm back! this is the final part of my story (i literally cried writing the first draft of this!) and it's where vince commit suicide! (sorry vince fangirls) but i've been told to put this up pronto and here it is! FYI, there's a small sneaky reference to the episode party in here! be sure to spot it!**

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Final Chapter

**Sorry**

When Vince awoke, the sunlight was shining through the blinds.

When he sat up, he caught a sight of his reflection on his dressing table mirror.

He was pale, make up smeared all over his face, eyes puffy and red from crying and had dried red dots on his arm from last night.

After a long shower and a quick change (no make up), Vince felt ready to face the world.

Unlocking the lock, Vince opened the door and stepped out into the living area to find Naboo, bollo and a young blonde woman sat on the sofa, Naboo and the blonde smoking from a bong.

"Er-morning?"

"Morning, Vince," Naboo answered, sounding as stoned as he usually is.

"Who's the blonde?"

"Calypso. She was my blind date last night arranged by Saboo. She's an evening star."

"Hi."

"Hi, Vince."

Naboo, calypso and bollo soon went off on shaman business, leaving Vince alone in the flat.

Lying down on the sofa, Vince closed his eyes.

About half an hour later, Vince sat up and headed towards the bedroom. Leaving the door unlocked, Vince scribbled a note:

**Dear bollo, Naboo and Howard,**

**I love you all**

**I'm sorry**

**I'm sorry Howard but if you can't have me**

**No one can**

**Goodbye for now,**

**Vince**

Then reaching into the drawer, Vince pulled out the knife and held it towards his heart.

**My heart has hurt because of you Howard, **was the last thought Vince had before plunging the blade deep into his chest.

Naboo and bollo had found Howard and demanded he return to the flat.

"Vince?"

When they returned to the flat, it was eerily quiet.

"Vince?"

Howard walked towards the bedroom and pushed open the door.

Seeing Vince slumped dead on their bed, the knife sticking out of his chest, blood over the sheets, his once bright blue eyes glossed over and dulled.

"Hey Howard, what's up—OH GOD!"

Naboo and bollo had entered the bedroom.

"Oh, god. Vince committed suicide and it's my entire fault!"

Howard kneeled at the bed, crying into Vince's black nail-varnished hand. Then he prised the note out of his hand and read it over and over, jazz tears staining the mod's scribbling.

"Oh, god."

Howard collapses in hysterical tears as Naboo takes the tear-smudged note from the jazz maverick.

"'I'm sorry, Howard, but if you can't have me, no one can.' Well, at least you know you drove Vince to kill himself. Did you really love him, Howard? Or were you using him?"

"Naboo, I loved him. I loved him then and I love him now!"

"So, why? Why did you make him die?"

"At my birthday party, calypso's baby sister, Helena was drunk and he kissed her and I walked in on them. It hurt. So I decided to leave to clear my head. I never knew it would hurt him this much for this to happen!"

"I'll speak to calypso to ask about what happened between Helena and Vince."

As Naboo and bollo exit, Howard turns back to the bed.

"I'm sorry, Vince," he whispered. "I wish I could turn back time so we could still be together."

Then he leans and kisses vice on his lips, which was now cold, for the last time and leaves the room, closing the door gently behind him.

**THE END**

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**A/N: I'm sorry! Don't hit me! (gets hit by a giant iceblock) Anyway, R&R! Once again, don't flame me! It makes me feel fu----g bad! (gomenasai on the language but I'm so damn mad at the moment!) **

**There may be a oneshot sequel to this but i don't know yet!**

**Sayonara!**

**Jade-chan**


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